I have had enough spare time to ponder the significance of the domestic arrangements of emus.
It seems that the female buggers off as soon as her eggs are laid, leaving the male to incubate and hatch, then raise, the 3 or 4 offspring through to adolescence.
And as if that were not strange enough, the dads do their best to abduct and subsequently raise the offspring of other males.
And as if that were not strange enough, the dads do their best to abduct and subsequently raise the offspring of other males.
Why would they do this? What's in it for them?
The way I see it is this:
An emu's brain is about the size of one of Scott Morrison's testicles, so altruism and generosity of spirit can be ruled out.
Also, the biggest motivator of all, self-interest, requires linear logic, difficult with a brain the size of an astoundingly small testicle.
And since they don't actually eat their offspring, it must be all about sex.
They might be a little slow, but they are smart enough to realize that their chances of a bit of nooky seem to be directly proportional to the size of their foster family.
And why would a female emu be more likely to let a male with a large bunch of kids get a bit of rumpy-pumpy than an unattached male, all else (eg. schlong size) being equal?
Survival of the species? A good provider for the family?
No. (v.s. comments re cognitive ability of emus): Somebody else to do the housework.
So, a male emu with a big creche of chicks is the emu equivalent of a bloke with a large house, a big bank balance and a flash motor car.
Female emus use the same principals, exactly, as English women.
And, to quote Groucho, the similarity doesn't end there.
And, to quote Groucho, the similarity doesn't end there.
